Soothe

My nighttime routine begins when my kids go to bed and I can get time to myself.

Which of your routines brings you the most balance right now?

Sometimes I struggle when my child is angry or having a tantrum in public or won't go to bed when I am exhausted and frustrated.

What helps you to stay calm and able to respond sensitively to your child in a moment of frustration?

My toddler, Jacob, is now 2 years and 2 months old. He breastfeeds several times a day, especially at naptime or at night.

If you breastfed, how did weaning go for you? What do you feel when you find yourself looking back on breastfeeding? What do you enjoy about your relationship with your child now?

In front of the wood-burning stove, well into winter, we began our typical summer vacation daydreaming. We settled at last on a cross-country road trip to see family.

What car ride activities do you offer your children?

Summer vacation will have both terrible and wonderful moments. When we know that both will happen, and that we can lead our children by responding thoughtfully to the circumstances that present themselves to us, we can look forward to this season.

When did your child have an opportunity to release his pent-up frustrations? What quick list of expectations can you offer your child the next time you are about to enter a stressful situation?

This morning, it snowed in Seattle. It reminded me of the night Max was born, almost exactly five years ago, when it was sunny and rainy and windy and then, in the middle of the night when we were upside-down with time and date, we looked out the window and saw snow swirling around.

How long has it been since your child's birth? How many times have you shared your birth story with others? How do you continue to celebrate the good and work through the challenges?

We want to celebrate our child's unique traits, but sometimes their differences can be worrying. We wonder if they seem a little out of step with developmental milestones or when their temperament seems much different when compared with other children?

My partner and I had asked all the big questions as we got ready for the birth of our son. We'd prepared ourselves both physically and spiritually for what we expected to be a smooth, beautiful childbirth assisted by our midwife.  It just never occurred to me that we would need anything besides each other to welcome our child into this world.

How do you feel about your childbirth experience? In which ways, did your experience help you to bond with your baby?

One of the hardest challenges with raising a special needs child is trying to keep people, including us as her parents, from attempting to force her into being a "typical" child. Jackie is different. She will always be different, and I celebrate that difference.

How do you allow your child to be different? How do you allow yourself to be different from other parents?

I never felt like I could get angry as a child. My parents sure did, but I got the message loud and clear that I was supposed to keep the peace, be good, and above all, never ever lose my cool. As a parent, I found myself getting angry at my child for being angry.

What if I let my daughter be angry? What if I just listened and empathized but didn't try to fix it?